Everybody was hoping that this new Dice-K who throws strikes and keeps batters on their heels would show up at Freezing Fenway tonight. Instead, we got the old one who spots most batters two balls before he tries to get them out. Sure, he got the win to start the season 3-0, but giving him the win is kind of like giving a batter an RBI when he gets plunked in the head with the bases loaded.

And Mike Timlin looks like he’s got as much stuff on his fastball as my sister does. No, my sister is not Jennie Finch, my sister throws like a girl. I hate Tito bringing him into close games like this, especially on Friday, but every year we write him off in April and every year he’s one of the cornerstones of the pen by June. So I’ll stop playing Nostradamus with him.

But even with a Papi-less lineup (which maybe was a benefit), the Sox pounded poor Philly Hughes. They made him throw 39 pitches in the first and was out of there in 2+ innings. I guess that averages out what the MFY bullpen had to do in this series after getting the night off on Friday. Manny looks like the bad man we all know him to be, and when Papi is still 3-43 on the season, that’s necessary.

Your Morganism for the night: telling everyone that sliding headfirst is a better than sliding feet-first because it gets you there faster. Two issues, 1) you don’t get to the base and faster and 2) every player who was on the DL because they broke a finger can tell you it’s NOT WORTH IT. That said, Coco still slides in head-first and it drives me bananas.

We took two of three from the MFY, in general had a pretty decent bullpen (that means you Aardsma, Lopez and Delcarmen…not you Timlin), and got to show the MFY the new upgrades to Fenway. I call that a productive weekend.